when ur sad always remember that u don’t look like you did in 6th grade
new olympic sport: the contestants must sit on their legs until they fall asleep and then run down a flight of stairs
Apple juice is just apple blood. Or apple pee. Whichever floats your fancy.
Today I put my hand in my backpack and felt a stress ball and I was like “oh? I have a stress ball?” and I squeezed it and it was a pear and it exploded and now I’m much more stressed than I was earlier :/